You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
