I'll bet she douches with gravy.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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