i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
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