No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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