Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
