Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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