Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
