i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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