dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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