I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
