I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
