I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I can't turn off my feet"
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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