Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize