Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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