you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
