THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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