I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
