how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize
