I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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