On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
