he wants to bone in the snuggie
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
