So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
