Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
