one might say we're banned from that church
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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