Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
