You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize
