just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
