based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
