Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize