Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
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