Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
