yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I party with great urgency now.
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