the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
