So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize
