why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
