Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
