just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Randomize