I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
