I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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