Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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