i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
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