How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize