Your face is a jimmy john
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize