He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
