i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
