It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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