Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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