Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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