Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
