Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Maybe he injected his testicle?
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
